BEN BROWNER

About 18 months before this year's MANiFEST, my father had a massive hemorrhagic stroke, became half-paralyzed and was unable to speak. I immediately became his full time medical advocate for 2 months, then caregiver for 7 months, then hospiced his death for the final 2 months... Two weeks after my dad passed away in my arms, I turned 40 years old... I woke up the next morning with the stark realization that not only was I the patriarch of my entire lineage, but that I'd been violently thrust into becoming a man.

 The issue was that society never gave me an initiatory blueprint for how to actually BE a man. 

I - like many others - have read dozens of books on the subject, been to countless retreats on the matter, sat with the question in plant ceremonies, cried in the arms of very capable brothers more times than I can count, and yet this concept of "manhood" proves slippery. 

Even though the entire MANiFEST Gathering is centered around a similar quandery, I'd like to invite us in to a space that asks the question more explicitly. Not to search for answers per say - but to tell our deepest life stories with one another - in triads and full group processes:  What has your journey to manhood looked like? What has it felt like? What arcs and patterns have you noticed? What pitfalls have you tumbled into? What are you learning? What are you celebrating? Come share your story as vulnerably as you're able to, in the company of other men exploring a similar question. 

Let us hold one another in the depths of our lived experience. Let us feel what it's like to be truly seen at our core. May the very deepest layers we are brave enough to unfurl soak up the light of day, without judgement, only love, and utter confidentiality.

I can hold this space for you.

Will you hold it for me?

BEN BROWNER

Co-Producer of MANiFEST, REVIVAL & the soon-to-be TERRA PROJECT, Ben apparently likes to create things. He lives in Discovery Bay with 2 dogs & 2 cats that he inherited from his late father. These animals stare at him all day while he tries to get work done around his property. Ben has been in a bit of a rut lately after some pretty dramatic shifts of identity, but summer promises time in the mountains with friends, and hopefully less computer work. Once he's finished building the last two tiny houses on his property, his plan is to rent them out and drive to many unknown destinations, ever-guided by the flipping of a coin and the asking of a perennial question: "Where is the nearest river to jump in?"

Or maybe he'll get married and have kids. 

The jury's still out. 

(Hence the title of the workshop above).